Abitaman Triathlon
Lake Las Vegas Triathlon
Wildflower International Distance
Newport Beach Triathlon
Pigman Sprint
Sourdough Half-Ironman - or actually "Unnofficial Olympic"
Chicago Triathlon
FIRMman Triathlon
Meat Pie Triathlon
Abitaman Triathlon, Navarre Beach, Florida, April 4, 2004
This is about the latest time of year I can contemplate racing in Florida. Navarre Beach: yeah, that sounds pleasant. A Gulf Coast resort town with a relaxed ambience, lovely for easing into the season. I aim to find out what an Abitaman is, and whether I want to be one. I'll knife through the cerulean waters, zip along the perfectly flat roads, and stumble through the run in the gasping humidity.
And of course there should be some chow. "You may want to begin your seafood feast with a dozen oysters as big as a child's fist or a basket of boiled shrimp. But save room for the hush puppies, a staple with most any seafood platter," says the Convention and Visitors Bureau. Yup, I may just do that. (back to top)
April 12, 2004
Hey, I did this and it rocked. Read about it!
All You Can Eat Racing: Lake Las Vegas Triathlon, Las Vegas, Nevada, April 25, 2004
www.mountainmanevents.com/lake_lasvegas.htm. What better place to contrast the discipline of triathlon with the constant lure of supersized, superabundant America? Bike legs, run legs, and all you can eat snow crab legs. I once saw a sign outside Caesar's Palace on one Vegas jaunt that announced: "All You Can Eat - All You Can Imagine." And that's what we love about Vegas. (back to top)
May 10, 2004
All you can eat! All you can imagine! Lake Las Vegas race report
Wildflower: Woodstock of Triathlon, San Antonio Lake, California, May 2, 2004
Wildflower is a four-day festival of triathlon, the second largest triathlon event in the world, held out in the very middle of nowhere in the most populous state in the Union. Thousands of triathletes, sponsors, vendors, reporters, volunteers, and spectators are all converging on a county park with one entrance gate in rural Monterey County. As you sit in the line in the bright May sunshine, cyclists zoom up and down the road, warming up the weekend's races. (back to top)
May 10, 2004: I ended up not doing this race after all. No injury or illness, just a schedule conflict that couldn't be resolved any other way. So, alas, no report. I did have a good time down at the lake, though.
Newport Beach Sprint Triathlon, Newport Beach, California, May 23, 2004
This was a last-minute addition to the schedule, after I had to pull out of Wildflower. It says it's the longest running triathlon in the world, going every year since 1978. Then it was a bike-run-swim event. I wonder how many people they had to pull out of the ocean before they changed the order around?
May 28, 2004: Yet another barrel of laughs! Read about the Mud Crawl and the Shopping Mall right here.
Pigman Sprint Triathlon, Cedar Rapids, Iowa. June 6, 2004
I'm saddened to report that the Pigman Sprint is not THE Pigman, the famous Half-Ironman race through rolling cornfields and pig farms. But the Pigman long course race conflicts with the Chicago Triathlon, which I just have to do.
I've been to Iowa a few time, so I know that the racing will be well-organized, the people will be polite, and the food will be hearty and plentiful. Pork, corn, potatoes, Czech food, German food, and ooooohhhh, Amish food from the colonies outside of Cedar Rapids. That should lead either to some epic indulgences or some serious triumphs of mind over batter. (back to top)
June 6, 2004: Read all about the Big Pig Gig!
Sourdough Triathlon, Fairbanks, Alaska, July 17, 2004 (www.runningclubnorth.org)
All I can learn from the Internet is this: "Bring your own potluck dish to the post-race meal. Contact Bad Bob Baker, 907-455-6689." I don't think that I'll have much in the way of a kitchen when I stay up there, so I may have to resort to a box of donuts or something.
This is the only Half-Ironman race on my rather hectic schedule for the year, but I figure if you're going all the way to Fairbanks, Alaska, it shouldn't be for a sprint race that will be over in an hour and change. And what will I eat in Fairbanks? Salmon, no doubt, like the grizzlies do. Halibut? King Crab? Moose? Sourdough things? How do Alaskan triathletes, and Alaskans in general, keep from eating themselves into sphericality during the long dark winters? (back to top)
August 7, 2004: Well, this turned out to be an Olympic Distance race when the 1/2 Ironman had to be cancelled due to forest fires. What a tale!
World's Biggest, Broadest Shouldered: The Chicago Triathlon, August 29, 2004 This is the largest single triathlon in the entire world, with over 5,000 participants in the sprint and Olympic distance races. It's also the World Championship race for Clydesdale triathletes, as defined by Team Clydesdale.(That's racing for fatties, in short.) The antithesis of the Sourdough Tri, the Chicago triathlon is urban, teeming with sweating, striving, humid Midwestern humanity. You swim in Lake Michigan; you end up by the famous Buckingham Fountain.
And of course, one of the ways that Clydesdales and Lady Clydesdales stay in their weight classes is sampling all the local cuisine. Chicago is a great town for eating, and I really love eating there. I love pizza three inches thick and the no-frills corned beef sandwiches at the Berghoff. I'd love to be able to get to love Charlie Trotter's, Ambria, and some of the other high-bling establishments the city offers, but I guess that depends on the size of the budget. If the budget is low, I love Chicago hot dogs too, with sneaky-hot sport peppers and that weird glow-in-the-dark green relish, and NEVER any ketchup. (back to top)
August 31, 2004: Slow Fat Triathlete Sets World Record in Age/Weight Class! Read all about it!
Lobsterman Triathlon, Freeport, Maine. September 11, 2004
OK, I admit, I also want to go to the L.L. Bean outlet. When I was in school in Boston, I didn't have a car, and we didn't make the famous midnight run to Freeport to buy Bean boots and dense wool sweaters. But besides that, Lobsterman is a big race. It's a regional USA Triathlon championship, so there'll be lots of fast people there, and there's a lobster bake after the race, so there'll be lots of people like me there, eager to race and then chow down on fresh seafood and corn on the cob. (back to top)
August 7, 2004 update: After the Sourdough 1/2 Ironman turned into an Olympic distance race, I decided to swap out the Lobsterman from my schedule and replace it with the FIRMman Half-Ironman in Narragansett, Rhode Island, on September 12. The name's a little weird (I think FIRM is the name of the race production company), but the course should be very scenic and so I'll get to fit my Half-IM race in.
October 8, 2004: Finally, I got this race report done. What an epic trip!
The Meat Pie Tri in Natchitoches, Louisiana, September 19, 2004
I was thinking of doing the Gatorman in Lake Charles, but I really couldn't resist a triathlon neamed Meat Pie. It's sort of perfect for a Slow Fat Triathlete, don'tcha think? Oh, yeah, and there'll be racing too. Have you noticed that the further into this season I get, the less I talk about triathlon and the more I talk about food?
October 8, 2004: This was a heck of a season. And the Meat Pie Tri was a heck of a culmination to that.
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